作者: negro (O O) 看板: feeling
標題: grown
時間: 東吳機研站 Tue Jul 1 21:01:59 2003
my mom judges me as a childish boy;
i could not have myself agree with it, but self-doubt about it
since i thought, i was quite self-central
the teen ages especially
i was different from others absolutely
i was meant to be for something
but the older i am, the more thing i get through
i doubt about myself more
this confused me these days... terriblely
the accident, the girl who once loved me for all; i devoted for all
legs that doesn't work, sense that doesn't work
am i that strong? as you think?
maybe i'm just a childish boy who dreams all his life
maybe all those people i don't wanna be with
are much more grown than i am
because i felt pain inside hard
as these times passed by
i lose my life, dream also
i lose my steps for goal
depression with no exit
that puts me uncomfortable
but i'm bearing these, now, the day that happened, all the time
it's intresting to feel these change
grow up again and again
but still silly, child-like
doubt again and again
comfirm once after another
i can't help being down after i heard from her, telling her thoughts
it's so unfair; it's killing me
one word spoken after another hurt my feeling again and again
it's magically i keep my face a joker on
i can't help feeling sick about
doing same exercise for repairing my body days and days
for no hope and future
too forced to shake un-stopable
painless falling down and down
fake family relationship in public disgusting
doctors, parents, people speaking around...fuck
health stinks
love stinks
but
hurt develops brain and mind
i'll go on and so do these shits
i doubt about myself: if i was that strong?
but i'm sure that i'm getting stronger
i can't drow; i can't write; for now
but someday i would....
i'm so glad to have you on-line telling me these
changes can only be changed by ourselves
fate is fated
living in times is going non-stop
choking to death or floating up for self depands on self
i'm diving still, but forget about me
i'll be okay while i come up for breath
--
※From: 東吳機研 scumotor.com.tw negro From 218-164-100-93.HINET-IP. ...
一個玩車人的天地/各車系專屬區/GP SBK TIS賽事討論區/進口車討論區/